This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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