theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
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