I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize