I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
