so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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