SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
