I'm going to jail i love you
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
