It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize