I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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