So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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