Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I can text with my tongue
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
