I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
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This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
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So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
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I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis