I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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