we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
