Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
