That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
