we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
