someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
