Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
