My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Randomize
