dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
