I feel like abortions should bother me more
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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