If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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