The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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