Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
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