I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
