May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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