did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
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