i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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