It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
