oh god the rape fog is back!
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
