Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize