You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
