they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
People With No Siblings Will Never Understand These 23 Things
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Houston, we have a blender
25 Seemingly Normal Things That Give Some People Massive Anxiety
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.