Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
