You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
