Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
