you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize