definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
