Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
