I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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