Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
