I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
