you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
