Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
