Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
