It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
