I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Blow job season was short but glorious.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
