Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize