would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Someone signed my nipple.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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