So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize